Intimacy and Desire book cover

Intimacy and Desire by David Schnarch Summary

Intimacy and Desire
David Schnarch
4.21 (456 Reviews)
Psychology
Self-growth
Health
Overview
Key Takeaways
Author
FAQs

Overview of Intimacy and Desire

Dr. Schnarch's revolutionary guide reveals why sexual desire problems are normal in committed relationships. Through real case studies, he challenges conventional wisdom about intimacy - showing how the tension between "High" and "Low" desire partners can spark growth, not signal failure. Ready to transform marital conflict into passion?

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Key takeaways

1

The Paradox of Love and Desire

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When was the last time you felt truly desired by your partner? Or perhaps you're the one struggling to feel desire despite loving them deeply? This paradox haunts countless relationships, yet clinical psychologist David Schnarch discovered something revolutionary: sexual desire problems aren't signs of dysfunction but normal developmental challenges that can catalyze profound personal growth. His groundbreaking "Crucible Approach" reframes the conversation entirely. Rather than viewing fading passion as a relationship death sentence, what if it's actually an invitation to deeper connection and personal evolution? The truth about desire lies not in new positions or date nights, but in understanding the intricate dance between your sense of self and your capacity for intimacy.

2

The Universal Low-Desire Partner Dynamic

3

How Your Sense of Self Shapes Desire

4

The Hidden Control Patterns in Relationships

5

The Four Points of Balance: Your Path to Desire

6

The Two Faces of Intimacy

7

From Sexual Boredom to Passionate Connection

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@Matt, YC alum
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@Erin, Investment Banking Associate , NYC
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@djmikemoore
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@Chloe, Solo founder, LA
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@Raaaaaachelw
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"Crazy how much I learned while walking the dog. BeFreed = small habits → big gains."

@Matt, YC alum
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12
likes
108

"Reading used to feel like a chore. Now it’s just part of my lifestyle."

@Erin, Investment Banking Associate , NYC
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comments
254
likes
17

"Feels effortless compared to reading. I’ve finished 6 books this month already."

@djmikemoore
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"BeFreed turned my guilty doomscrolling into something that feels productive and inspiring."

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"BeFreed replaced my podcast queue. Imagine Spotify for books — that’s it. 🙌"

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