What Your ADHD Child Wishes You Knew by Sharon Saline Summary
Overview of What Your ADHD Child Wishes You Knew
Dr. Saline's award-winning guide decodes what ADHD children desperately need from parents. Endorsed by Dr. Edward Hallowell as "wise, kind, and teeming with children's voices," it's transformed parent-child relationships with its revolutionary "5 C's" approach that one parent called "relationship-saving."
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Key takeaways
When Your Child's Brain Works Differently-And That's Okay
Picture a child standing in the middle of a classroom, frozen. Not because they're defiant or lazy, but because their brain is processing seventeen different stimuli at once-the hum of fluorescent lights, a whispered conversation three rows back, the texture of their shirt tag, yesterday's unfinished argument with a friend. Now imagine that same child at home, exploding in tears over a minor request, not because they're manipulative, but because they've spent eight hours holding themselves together in a world not designed for how their mind works. This is the daily reality for millions of children with ADHD, and understanding this gap between their internal experience and external behavior changes everything. The ADHD brain isn't a character flaw-it's a structural difference. Certain regions are smaller, thinner, and less active, particularly the prefrontal cortex that doesn't fully mature until the late twenties. There's also an imbalance in neurotransmitters like dopamine and norepinephrine, which affect everything from attention to emotional regulation. Imagine trying to watch a movie where the film keeps skipping, the volume randomly changes, and the picture occasionally freezes. That's what processing information can feel like with ADHD. When we stop asking "Why won't you just focus?" and start asking "What does focus feel like for you?"-when we move from frustration to curiosity-we unlock not just better behavior, but genuine connection with a child who desperately wants to succeed but doesn't always know how. Executive functioning-those "director" skills that help you plan, organize, manage time, and control impulses-is where ADHD children struggle most. These skills fall into "hot" categories (conscious and behavior-related, like managing emotions and organizing tasks) and "cool" categories (unconscious and thinking-related, like working memory and focus). Nine-year-old Liam's experience in orchestra captures this perfectly: "I couldn't find the right music. Then, I stood up to ask when the performance was..." What looks like disorganization or impulsivity is actually multiple executive functioning breakdowns happening simultaneously. Here's what complicates things further: 45-71% of children with ADHD also have learning differences, most commonly in writing. Writing is particularly challenging because it requires simultaneous executive functioning-retrieving information, organizing ideas, planning structure, managing time, and persisting through frustration. Jack feels "trapped inside the page" with no words; Kia experiences physical discomfort while writing but loves storytelling. Nearly half of children with hyperactive or combined-type ADHD also struggle with disruptive behavior issues, anxiety, or depression. Anxiety amplifies distractibility; depression feeds on the negative self-talk ADHD children already battle. These aren't separate problems-they're interconnected challenges that require comprehensive understanding.
The Five C's Framework: Your Navigation System Through Daily Challenges
From Diagnosis to Acceptance: Building Identity and Partnership
School Success: Navigating the Daily Mountain with Practical Solutions
Emotional Regulation and Building Daily Life Skills
Social Relationships, Technology, and Real-World Navigation
The Long View: What Your Child Wants You to Know
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From Columbia University alumni built in San Francisco
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"Crazy how much I learned while walking the dog. BeFreed = small habits → big gains."
"Reading used to feel like a chore. Now it’s just part of my lifestyle."
"Feels effortless compared to reading. I’ve finished 6 books this month already."
"BeFreed turned my guilty doomscrolling into something that feels productive and inspiring."
"BeFreed turned my commute into learning time. 20-min podcasts are perfect for finishing books I never had time for."
"BeFreed replaced my podcast queue. Imagine Spotify for books — that’s it. 🙌"
"It is great for me to learn something from the book without reading it."
"The themed book list podcasts help me connect ideas across authors—like a guided audio journey."
"Makes me feel smarter every time before going to work"
From Columbia University alumni built in San Francisco
"Instead of endless scrolling, I just hit play on BeFreed. It saves me so much time."
"I never knew where to start with nonfiction—BeFreed’s book lists turned into podcasts gave me a clear path."
"Perfect balance between learning and entertainment. Finished ‘Thinking, Fast and Slow’ on my commute this week."
"Crazy how much I learned while walking the dog. BeFreed = small habits → big gains."
"Reading used to feel like a chore. Now it’s just part of my lifestyle."
"Feels effortless compared to reading. I’ve finished 6 books this month already."
"BeFreed turned my guilty doomscrolling into something that feels productive and inspiring."
"BeFreed turned my commute into learning time. 20-min podcasts are perfect for finishing books I never had time for."
"BeFreed replaced my podcast queue. Imagine Spotify for books — that’s it. 🙌"
"It is great for me to learn something from the book without reading it."
"The themed book list podcasts help me connect ideas across authors—like a guided audio journey."
"Makes me feel smarter every time before going to work"
"Instead of endless scrolling, I just hit play on BeFreed. It saves me so much time."
"I never knew where to start with nonfiction—BeFreed’s book lists turned into podcasts gave me a clear path."
"Perfect balance between learning and entertainment. Finished ‘Thinking, Fast and Slow’ on my commute this week."
"Crazy how much I learned while walking the dog. BeFreed = small habits → big gains."
"Reading used to feel like a chore. Now it’s just part of my lifestyle."
"Feels effortless compared to reading. I’ve finished 6 books this month already."
"BeFreed turned my guilty doomscrolling into something that feels productive and inspiring."
"BeFreed turned my commute into learning time. 20-min podcasts are perfect for finishing books I never had time for."
"BeFreed replaced my podcast queue. Imagine Spotify for books — that’s it. 🙌"
"It is great for me to learn something from the book without reading it."
"The themed book list podcasts help me connect ideas across authors—like a guided audio journey."
"Makes me feel smarter every time before going to work"
"Instead of endless scrolling, I just hit play on BeFreed. It saves me so much time."
"I never knew where to start with nonfiction—BeFreed’s book lists turned into podcasts gave me a clear path."
"Perfect balance between learning and entertainment. Finished ‘Thinking, Fast and Slow’ on my commute this week."
"Crazy how much I learned while walking the dog. BeFreed = small habits → big gains."
"Reading used to feel like a chore. Now it’s just part of my lifestyle."
"Feels effortless compared to reading. I’ve finished 6 books this month already."
"BeFreed turned my guilty doomscrolling into something that feels productive and inspiring."
"BeFreed turned my commute into learning time. 20-min podcasts are perfect for finishing books I never had time for."
"BeFreed replaced my podcast queue. Imagine Spotify for books — that’s it. 🙌"
"It is great for me to learn something from the book without reading it."
"The themed book list podcasts help me connect ideas across authors—like a guided audio journey."
"Makes me feel smarter every time before going to work"
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