Question 1

What is The Way I Used to Be about?

Accepted Answer

The Way I Used to Be by Amber Smith is a young adult novel that follows fourteen-year-old Eden after she is raped by her brother's best friend. The book chronicles Eden's four years of high school—freshman through senior year—as she struggles with trauma, self-destructive behavior, and the burden of keeping her assault a secret. Eden transforms from a "good girl" into someone unrecognizable, navigating broken friendships, failed relationships, and her own spiral into anger and recklessness before finally finding the courage to speak her truth.

Question 2

Who should read The Way I Used to Be by Amber Smith?

Accepted Answer

The Way I Used to Be is best suited for mature young adult readers and adults who can handle sensitive content about sexual assault and trauma. This book resonates deeply with survivors of sexual violence, particularly those who experienced hypersexuality and rebellion as coping mechanisms. Readers who appreciated Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson or seek honest, unflinching portrayals of trauma recovery will find value in Amber Smith's debut novel. Mental health advocates, educators, and anyone seeking to understand the long-term impact of sexual assault should consider this powerful narrative.

Question 3

Is The Way I Used to Be worth reading?

Accepted Answer

The Way I Used to Be is worth reading for its raw, honest portrayal of trauma and survival, though it requires emotional resilience. Readers describe it as "a fucking punch in the gut" that "holds nothing back," making it extraordinarily powerful yet difficult to process. While some critics note issues with writing quality, shallow supporting characters, and oblivious parents, the book's strength lies in validating survivors' experiences and providing hope rather than neat closure. For debut fiction tackling such a challenging subject, Amber Smith delivers an important and memorable story.

Question 4

Who is Amber Smith and why did she write The Way I Used to Be?

Accepted Answer

Amber Smith is an author who made her literary debut with The Way I Used to Be in 2016, establishing herself as a voice for sexual assault survivors in young adult fiction. The novel emerged from Smith's desire to create a narrative that authentically represents the aftermath of rape, particularly the less-discussed responses like hypersexuality and self-destructive behavior that many survivors experience. Her work has been compared to landmark YA novels like Speak, positioning Smith as an important contemporary author addressing trauma, consent, and recovery in young adult literature.

Question 5

What are the main themes in The Way I Used to Be?

Accepted Answer

The Way I Used to Be explores trauma, silence, and survival as its central themes. The novel examines how keeping secrets—especially about sexual assault—can destroy a person's sense of self and relationships over time. Other prominent themes include the loss of innocence, the struggle between victim and survivor identity, and the long-term psychological impact of rape on adolescent development. Smith also addresses themes of self-destruction as a coping mechanism, the rebuilding of trust, and ultimately the power of speaking one's truth after years of silence.

Question 6

How does The Way I Used to Be portray Eden's trauma and recovery?

Accepted Answer

The Way I Used to Be portrays trauma through Eden's four-year deterioration across high school, showing how buried pain manifests in self-destructive behavior. Eden disconnects from her body, loses faith in her judgment of people, and spirals into alcohol, drugs, promiscuity, and anger as coping mechanisms. Rather than linear recovery, Smith presents a realistic, messy journey where Eden pushes away everyone who cares about her and punishes herself and others. The book ends with hope rather than complete closure, acknowledging that healing from trauma is an ongoing process, not an overnight transformation.

Question 7

Why is The Way I Used to Be compared to Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson?

Accepted Answer

The Way I Used to Be is compared to Speak because both novels center on teenage girls navigating high school after experiencing rape and choosing silence over disclosure. Like Melinda in Speak, Eden in The Way I Used to Be becomes isolated, struggles academically and socially, and undergoes a transformation that alienates her from her former self. Both books are considered landmark young adult fiction for their honest, unflinching examination of sexual assault and its aftermath. However, The Way I Used to Be differs by spanning four years and exploring hypersexuality as a trauma response, whereas Speak focuses more on muteness and artistic expression.

Question 8

What happens to Eden throughout The Way I Used to Be?

Accepted Answer

Eden begins as a "good girl" starting freshman year, but after being raped by her brother's best friend Kevin, she transforms completely. She dates Josh, a senior basketball star, but cannot be honest with him about her feelings or trauma, leading to their breakup. Throughout sophomore and junior years, Eden's reputation deteriorates as she engages in casual sex, parties, drinking, and drugs while pushing away her best friend Mara and her family. By senior year, Eden has isolated herself completely until Kevin's girlfriend and sister reveal they are also his victims, finally giving Eden the courage to speak about her own assault.

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Key takeaways

Breaking the Silence: A Story of Recovery and Healing

Behind the Mask: Reinvention as Survival

The Ripple Effect: When One Trauma Touches Many Lives

The Predator's Playbook: How Abusers Hide in Plain Sight

Breaking the Silence: The First Step Toward Healing

The Memory That Won't Stay Buried

Finding Your Voice Again: The Ongoing Journey of Healing

The Way I Used to Be by Amber Smith Summary

Overview of The Way I Used to Be

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More like this

Key takeaways

Breaking the Silence: A Story of Recovery and Healing

Behind the Mask: Reinvention as Survival

The Ripple Effect: When One Trauma Touches Many Lives

The Predator's Playbook: How Abusers Hide in Plain Sight

Breaking the Silence: The First Step Toward Healing

The Memory That Won't Stay Buried

Finding Your Voice Again: The Ongoing Journey of Healing

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