Succeeding When You're Supposed to Fail by Rom Brafman Summary
Overview of Succeeding When You're Supposed to Fail
Discover why resilience defies destiny in Brafman's groundbreaking exploration of success against all odds. Tom Rath called it "one of the most engaging books of the decade." What hidden principle separates those who crumble from those who triumph when failure seems inevitable?
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Key takeaways
When the Underdog Wins: Rewriting the Rules of Resilience
What separates those who rise from crushing circumstances from those who remain trapped by them? For decades, psychology had a simple answer: early trauma creates lasting damage. Period. Then came Emmy Werner's startling discovery in Kauai. Tracking nearly 700 children from birth into adulthood, she found something that shattered conventional wisdom-about one-third of kids facing poverty, family dysfunction, and neglect didn't just survive, they thrived. They excelled academically, built successful careers, and developed into psychologically healthy adults. Similar patterns emerged worldwide: children of schizophrenic parents who flourished, abuse survivors who became honor students. These weren't statistical flukes-they were tunnelers, people who somehow passed through barriers that should have been impenetrable. Consider Percy Spencer, orphaned at seven, forced to quit school before fifth grade to work in a mill. He taught himself advanced mathematics and science, eventually inventing the microwave oven. Or fashion mogul Elie Tahari, abandoned in Jerusalem orphanages, who arrived in New York with three dollars daily, slept on park benches, and built a half-billion-dollar empire. What did they possess that others lacked? Not superhuman strength or extraordinary luck, but three specific qualities anyone can cultivate: an internal sense of control, unwavering commitment, and an even temperament under pressure.
Taking the Wheel: Where You Place Your Attention Changes Everything
The Meaning-Making Machine: Why Purpose Outweighs Comfort
The Relentless Ones: When Commitment Becomes Unstoppable
Staying Cool When the Heat Rises: The Even-Tempered Advantage
The Healing Power of Laughter: Humor as Psychological Shield
Your Secret Weapon: The Transformative Power of Unconditional Support
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From Columbia University alumni built in San Francisco
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"Crazy how much I learned while walking the dog. BeFreed = small habits → big gains."
"Reading used to feel like a chore. Now it’s just part of my lifestyle."
"Feels effortless compared to reading. I’ve finished 6 books this month already."
"BeFreed turned my guilty doomscrolling into something that feels productive and inspiring."
"BeFreed turned my commute into learning time. 20-min podcasts are perfect for finishing books I never had time for."
"BeFreed replaced my podcast queue. Imagine Spotify for books — that’s it. 🙌"
"It is great for me to learn something from the book without reading it."
"The themed book list podcasts help me connect ideas across authors—like a guided audio journey."
"Makes me feel smarter every time before going to work"
From Columbia University alumni built in San Francisco
"Instead of endless scrolling, I just hit play on BeFreed. It saves me so much time."
"I never knew where to start with nonfiction—BeFreed’s book lists turned into podcasts gave me a clear path."
"Perfect balance between learning and entertainment. Finished ‘Thinking, Fast and Slow’ on my commute this week."
"Crazy how much I learned while walking the dog. BeFreed = small habits → big gains."
"Reading used to feel like a chore. Now it’s just part of my lifestyle."
"Feels effortless compared to reading. I’ve finished 6 books this month already."
"BeFreed turned my guilty doomscrolling into something that feels productive and inspiring."
"BeFreed turned my commute into learning time. 20-min podcasts are perfect for finishing books I never had time for."
"BeFreed replaced my podcast queue. Imagine Spotify for books — that’s it. 🙌"
"It is great for me to learn something from the book without reading it."
"The themed book list podcasts help me connect ideas across authors—like a guided audio journey."
"Makes me feel smarter every time before going to work"
"Instead of endless scrolling, I just hit play on BeFreed. It saves me so much time."
"I never knew where to start with nonfiction—BeFreed’s book lists turned into podcasts gave me a clear path."
"Perfect balance between learning and entertainment. Finished ‘Thinking, Fast and Slow’ on my commute this week."
"Crazy how much I learned while walking the dog. BeFreed = small habits → big gains."
"Reading used to feel like a chore. Now it’s just part of my lifestyle."
"Feels effortless compared to reading. I’ve finished 6 books this month already."
"BeFreed turned my guilty doomscrolling into something that feels productive and inspiring."
"BeFreed turned my commute into learning time. 20-min podcasts are perfect for finishing books I never had time for."
"BeFreed replaced my podcast queue. Imagine Spotify for books — that’s it. 🙌"
"It is great for me to learn something from the book without reading it."
"The themed book list podcasts help me connect ideas across authors—like a guided audio journey."
"Makes me feel smarter every time before going to work"
"Instead of endless scrolling, I just hit play on BeFreed. It saves me so much time."
"I never knew where to start with nonfiction—BeFreed’s book lists turned into podcasts gave me a clear path."
"Perfect balance between learning and entertainment. Finished ‘Thinking, Fast and Slow’ on my commute this week."
"Crazy how much I learned while walking the dog. BeFreed = small habits → big gains."
"Reading used to feel like a chore. Now it’s just part of my lifestyle."
"Feels effortless compared to reading. I’ve finished 6 books this month already."
"BeFreed turned my guilty doomscrolling into something that feels productive and inspiring."
"BeFreed turned my commute into learning time. 20-min podcasts are perfect for finishing books I never had time for."
"BeFreed replaced my podcast queue. Imagine Spotify for books — that’s it. 🙌"
"It is great for me to learn something from the book without reading it."
"The themed book list podcasts help me connect ideas across authors—like a guided audio journey."
"Makes me feel smarter every time before going to work"
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